What is the rudest/meanest thing a family member has said to you?

My dad threatening to “call the police on me” for picking my son up at his last sleep over at their house, for him wanting to GO HOME (where he has always lived), after telling him to lie to me, and text me that he never said that

Wow, how can a person pick just one? I have twenty that I consider mean, that they don't, so here goes:

Most recently - the millionth home I've lived in, had a door lock that was broken (along with several windows and doors at other properties, repeated car vandalism at work, cut up pillow on my porch, cut curtains, intimidation/threats/cruelty from total strangers, etc). I expressed how this made me fear for my safety. My dad rolled his eyes upon me telling him, I had to pressure him to fix it that night, and my mother has made 4 “jokes” about me dying or being dead, since

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At 9, my mother telling me to “shutup, we don't talk about those things” when I asked her at church, if it was possible to get pregnant by being fingered? Similarly, calling me a “slut” when my Grandma told her she caught my elementary school friend and I, pretending our Barbies were having sex

My dad writing on a desk calendar, “Lauren Meltdown: 40 mins” on multiple days, then my mother stating it was because I am more of a bitch on my period, so it was her idea to track it. My “meltdown” was over my son’s slipping grades, due to their constant abuse. He was on his way to STEM and Engineering before they moved closer

My mother - jokingly, sarcastically, and mockingly saying things like, “my brothers fate would be mine” or “yeah, I sold you to the neighbors” rather than being appalled I would ask, when pressing her about our shared sexual exposure and why she never actually protected us or held anyone accountable (nor feels remorse about it), as children

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The laughter at things that are actually extremely scary, the silence over what deserves explanation, the abandonment for being unwilling to just “let go” of all of the above. Telling me I need “help,” making others believe falsely that I am unstable, and my father screaming at me in front of my 9 year old at the time, that I'm “fucking delusional” …. For what, I'm still unsure.

During my childhood, both parents perpetuated the lie that Brazil is “filthy & poor, and that I would never want to go back there” Also that my biological mother was a whore

My dad screaming loudly that I am “crazy” in front of dozens of people at my son’s football practices, along with talking shit about me to other members of the community. My mom on the phone saying my brothers memorial was coming up, and annoyingly telling her friend that I was going to be “so distraught…”

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More recently, asking my child who the smartest in the family is, and then shaming him for saying me. When he moved on to my deceased brother, my father's response was, “he doesn't count, he's dead in the urn now,” gesturing toward it on the mantle, laughing. Time froze, as my mother sat there knitting, pretending not to hear. I was in shock. They both now deny this, even going as far as gaslighting my son about what he knows he heard

Later, he said that it “wasn't their fault my biological parents didn't use a condom”

Later, he said that I think I'm “so smart, but if it wasn't for them, I would've been left for dead, in Brazil” because I turned the wheel the wrong way, according to him, when backing out of a parking space, at Home Depot

Was there any slavery of white people that actually compares to the transatlantic slave trade? I’m not baiting or anything actually genuinely curious and want to know.

One of the worst is in what wasn't said by my mother: refusing to ask a family member why they said my mom “probably wouldn't shoot me, she’s not that type, but would make it look like I committed suicide,” and refusing to ask her why she said my mother was “fake crying when she told her about my brother's passing.” My mother is going to stay with this family member soon, more offended by me being totally terrorized and asking questions to understand, because I can't immediately escape, than the statements made. 🙃

My mother telling me she paid more for me to get me out of the country

My mother telling my son I “never did chores unless I was paid,” when I used to clean as a child, simply as a way to surprise my mother, when attempting to discuss chores with my son. Similarly, when attempting to hold my son accountable for his grades, “Why? You didn't get good grades,” as if I can't want him to be better than me

Hi everybody! I have been looking at posts on narcs and narc abuse on here and if has really helped me out a lot. I am currently struggling with my situation and need some advice/support. I met a narc last year, everything seemed to good to be true. Love bombing, always texting calling and taking me on dates. Everything changed when someone warned me about him out in public in front of him and who he is. This caused a conflict with us and the love bombing seized. he would tell me that everything is okay and i can come and talk. He would set a time limit on me and kick me out after that. he would then text me like everything was fine and we hung out again and after that he completely ghosted me for one week. He came back and texted me a week later laughing about the ghosting and acting like nothing had happened. he continued to text me ( not like in the beginning) make plans with me, then on the day of the plans he would just ghost me. One day he would act interested the next silence. i contacted him a month later and he acted like nothing happened. He was on a vacation and sent me a picture of another woman ( someone he allegedly met on the trip) to strike a reaction but i never gave him one. After the trip he came to my place and was extremely rude, accusing me of going on dates with a bunch of men. The next day he accused me of being an alcoholic and that he wanted nothing to do with me but said well maybe we can be "friends" then ghosted me i assumed at this point it was over and i would never hear from him again. He contacted me on the holiday a month later acting like everything was great. We ended up hanging out a month or so later and when we hung out it went well, i thought things were going in the right direction. after we hung out.. silence. I would try to text him and if he replied it would be very short then he just stopped replying. He ghosted me for almost three months. I thought he was done this time and of course he popped up again like nothing happened. At this point i was getting sick of if so i questioned him as to why he dissapeared and always does this. Of course he had some sob story about a injury and family member dying of cancer. I felt pity for him and he gave me an apology.. so i took him back stupidly. things seemed to be going smooth for a couple months, of course until his family member died and his injury got better he never contacted me and was distant. Menawhile, i was there for him during the difficult time for him. He lied to me about the funeral and never wanted to chat. I was chasing him and he would always claim nothing was wrong but when i said i thought he used me when he was down he could not handle it and would always tell me he didnt care and to go away. I would get so upset i would try texting him to work it out he would barelt respond and if he did he would not be nice about it. we did hang out a couple times after that, he would ignore me after. One day i was like hey i think you are seeing someone else, and i was like well ixam seeing someone so no problem if you are he said " buy bye good luck with your new guy stop contacting me" i was devastated and tried to get into contact with him for weeks then i just gave up and accepted it was over. He ended up contacting me a month later acting like everything was fine. He wanted to go out and have drinks i told him i would. He and i both seemed to have a great time. He ends up ignoring me again. I kept texting him trying to figure out what was wrong. He kept saying everything was fine and i said ok can we hang out again? He said maybe i was like why? He just kept saying maybe … our last conversation we had… i said what is wrong ? He said nothing is wrong everything is fine. I asked him why he keeps saying maybe. He said " maybe but i dont want to see you right now" i said why? He saix " im just not feeling it, if i wanted to date i would" i said why did you contact me less then a week ago wanting to go out? He said i didnt.. even though he did. So i said should i just move on or what? He said whatever you want to do. So i said that he was really confusing me and asked him if he had anything more to say before i move on? My messages were turning green so i panicked he blocked me and reacted irrationally. I said " omg did you block me? My messages are not going through. Even texted him on my work phone asking what was up. And called him twice ( please dont judge me i know it is pathetic i never was this type of girl before him) so he replied and said " Ok I'll block you now" then immedietly blocked me. He has never blocked me before since I have met him he will just ghost. Is this ths final discard aka " grand finale? Did i just push him too far? this has upset me so much its hard to even function.

I was adopted, and sometime in middle school, during a rage, my father called me a “mistake.” This is #1 most damaging. I believed him for a long, long time

Edit - the 20th, my mother telling me that of course she supports my book, as long as I can “live with the consequences of writing it.” Also, asking me if I felt like my life was “really that important” to write about.

That mine and my brothers’ life insurance, that makes me extremely uncomfortable given the above, “doesn't make a big enough dent in her wallet” for it to be worth it, for my mother to be involved in harming us or have wanted us dead (it's just funny though, somehow)

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An aunt that became livid that I took an ancestry test, and demanded that I “never tell anyone that I have South Cameroon in me” … brainwashing mean enough, to tell you to deny your own essence

I guess I could go “on and on,” but these are the meanest, the rudest, the worst, and the most unforgiveable that I can remember off the top of my head. The laughter about my death has invoked yet another attempt at No Contact, until I can leave. My mother told me a few years back, “you will never break the chain.” Shout-out to Fleetwood Mac, but respectfully, I will.

An uncle that was so racist, that he referred to me as “that girl,” rather than my name. It took my grandpa to stand up to this, not them

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My mother detailing the sexual trauma my brother endured at the hands of two neighbor children, out of nowhere in 2021, when simply asking if they were part of the charitable Mason group. Admitting to weaponizing this story (extremely painful to learn he was held down and couldn't even fight back), because she was sick of talking to me and I “made her” with my going ON and ON and ON